What is style & how to find your personal style

Hello there you gorgeous humans 😊. Let me start this by saying… this post will be perfect for anyone that is in a transition phase in their life and are struggling to find a true expression of their best selves. As humans… our bodies, minds, likes & dislikes change over time. One thing that never changes is the core of us. So, I would love for you to take a moment & be grateful for the beautiful core that you are.

 As women, we go through even more changes throughout our life. Those can be hormonal, being pregnant, post-pregnancy weight etc. Not even mentioning that from one day to the next you might feel heavier on certain dates throughout the month. That is totally fine. We are all in the same pot regardless if we are skinny or not. Therefore, I want you to know that no matter what size you are & what body shape there is a way to feel great about ourselves. All we need to do is accept what is & be certain in your head & in your heart that NOBODY IS PERFECT. We all have insecurities no matter the size or shape. But only when we accept them & release the expectations, we are able to see the full picture for what it really is & this helps tremendously on shifting our focus from what we are are not to how we can do best with what we do have right now while working towards bettering ourselves.

If you find that you have kind of lost your game, I am here to tell you that it is OK, sometimes we do forget the power that is in us. All we need to do is remember who we really are. I believe that everyone has their own beauty within, sometimes life experiences, wounds & pain are dimming our light but that doesn’t mean the light is not there.

What is style?

Diane Von Furstenberg said “STYLE IS SOMETHING THAT EACH OF US HAS. ALL WE NEED TO DO IS FIND IT”.  According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, style is defined as “a distinctive manner of expression, a manner or technique by which something is done, created or performed”. Personally, I am a strong believer in that style is deeply personal and has not got much to do with trends & WHAT’S IN at a moment in time. Style is more than that. It is kind of your signature or handwriting. It is individual & unique. Do you know how they say that EYES ARE THE WINDOW TO THE SOUL? Well…until you or someone takes the time to REALLY LOOK INTO YOUR EYES, you & everyone else will see your appearance, therefore style.

 With this being said…to find or rediscover your own personal style you need to KNOW EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE and dress for that AWESOME YOU. Knowing who you are & find your own, unique representation on that will empower you, will make you feel like you are in control over your life, will keep you positive & joyful, will lift your self-esteem & you’ll see that EPIC YOU every time you’ll look in the mirror. Plus…guess what? Feeling good, acceptant & love towards you will attract more of that & will make the people around you see you in the exact same light. This is not fake it till you make it. It is more like PLEASE, STOP FAKING IT! It is being true to who you really are, be grateful for the good in you and build on that. Read my previous blog if you would like more information about LINKS BETWEEN OUR CLOTHING AND EMOTIONAL STATES.

How to find your personal style?

If you read this far, I am sure you understand that nobody can tell what the perfect style for you is. Not without your input. There is not a recipe that fits all without you doing some work.  Finding your personal style is a process & it will evolve with time. The more you practice it, the more polished will be. Please be kind to yourself. Remember that it is ok to make mistakes (this is how we learn) and be vulnerable. Being vulnerable means being brave & taking risks, trial & error makes practise & gets you better. Comfort zones are fine if you are progressing & still bettering yourself. But we all know that success comes when we are stepping out of comfort zones and we explore.

8 Guidelines to help you find your personal style:

 1. Know who you are & dress for that gorgeous you. Like I said above. Take some time to be grateful for the best in you. Think of qualities that make you beautiful & light your soul. Write them down on a piece of paper. Those qualities can be anything you appreciate in you (e.g. kind, honest, bold, strong, empathic, sociable etc). Choose the 3-6 qualities you want to assert the most & draw them vividly in your soul. That is the core of you. For this YOU, you will dress from now on every single morning and for this you, you will shop clothing when you need to.

 2. Wardrobe review. Look in your closet & identify what you have multiples off, what are you wearing over & over again and why? Is it because makes you feel confident, happy & joyful etc? Is it because makes you feel comfortable? Is it because is a job requirement or something that you must wear? Identify what you like and take into consideration why you like it? Think about a colour scheme, fabric, brand, fit, silhouette, cut, hem, length etc. and take all of this into consideration. Choose what brings you joy & reflects the qualities on your list. There are 2 especially important things that you need to know here:

• You do not have to fit into any specific trend or fashion current. If you are in love with the 50’s fashion & that is what reflects you best, it’s fine. You are free to do so. But know that YOU ARE ALLOWED TO MIX BITS & PIECES IN ONE. I would advise exploring to make it as personal as possible.
• Observe & note the colour tones that compliment your skin tone. For this, you'll need to determine whether your skin is a warm or cool tone. Cool tone people have pink tones in their skin while warm tone people have more golden & yellow tones. In general warm skin tones will look much better in warn toned colours, while cool skin will look best in cool tone colours. Try this and see it for yourself.

 3. Know your body. Get dressed into something really fitted or get naked & look in the mirror. Look at your body carefully and be 100% honest with yourself. What is it that you like & what do you dislike? Obviously…this will determine what you want to accentuate through your style & what you would want to hide to not judge & feel uncomfortable within yourself every second of the day. Body shaming is hitting us from everywhere. Believe me, …you do not want to stare at that or feel it 24/7. Now…everyone’s body is different but there are some guidelines that will help you get a general idea of your body shape & how to dress it better.

There are 5 main body shapes and you will need to look at your shoulders, bust, waist & hips measurements:

• hourglass: you are an hourglass shape if your shoulder, bust & hip measurements are the same or close BUT your waist really nips in.
• rectangle: if your shoulder, bust & hip measurements are the same or close BUT your waist does NOT nip in you are a rectangle shape.
• circle/apple: if you are carrying your weight in the middle
• inverted triangle: will be someone that has broad shoulders and/or bust & narrower hips
• triangle/pear: is when your hips are bigger than your upper body (shoulder/bust)

TIP:  Determine whether you have a short or long torso by placing your closed palms horizontally from right under your bust to your belly button. There should be no space between your hands. If your hands are covering your belly button completely you have a short torso. If there is still a gap from your hand to your belly button you have a long torso. If there is no gap & your belly button is not fully covered you have a proportioned torso.

  4.Choose your signature/ go-to style. Now that you know who you are, have gone through your wardrobe, know what you would like to keep & know your body better…It’s time to have fun and create some outfits that will be there every time you need to leave the house in a rush & you don’t have the time to overthink what you put on. Those should be functional & versatile for your lifestyle while expressing the best you. You should be able to wear then for work, shopping, getting throughout your day as well as an evening dinner out.

TIP:  Incorporate in these, little signatures to make it YOURS. I, for example, like to wear some funny stuff from time to time. Like crazy colours/ pattern laces, a signature piece of jewellery or accessories.    

For you, it might be the way you wear your hair, or maybe cute dresses, or nice blazers. It can be anything that you like to wear often.

  5. Wear what makes you happy: Remember the list with your qualities & have that clear every time you get dressed. There will always be times & people that will not like you or agree with you or your style. All you need to know that your opinion & feel about yourself matter most. Be kind, empathic & considerate of others, be able to filter feedback & take what is constructive. But please, please, please girl. Do not waste your time & energy with mean comments. Use that time instead to better yourself & do what you do best.

  6. Importance of small things. This refers to LINGERIE, SOCK &UNDERGARMENTS. No matter how great your clothes are & bright your smile is. The moment you feel uncomfortable, check your back in the mirror & see the lines of your underwear digging into your skin, that smile will vanish and your style will look so much less put together. Invest time & money in good underwear & undergarments for a confidence boost & have one last thing to worry about when you dress.

  7. If you need to look for inspiration… LOOK FOR FASHION INSPIRATION & NOT A REASON TO HATE YOURSELF. Detach yourself from all the noise & asses the clothing, not the “perfect” model showcasing it, nor the amazing editorial that has been put together by professionals. I am 100% sure that if you would have a chat with the model, she does not think she is perfect in the sense that media is trying to sell it. INSTAGRAM, PINTREST, OLD MOVIES, BOOKS, MAGAZINES are all ok to draw inspiration from as long as you keep an objective eye.

P.S. I know & you probably know that I am selling clothing on my website. But the reason why we are doing limited edition items & write this to you is that money is not all that matter. Sustainability in fashion is very hard to achieve if money is all designer & clothing brands think. Plus… no matter what designers do to help fashion become sustainable it will not be enough without an educated & conscious consumer. My goal is to have my clients appreciate an item they have both from us & make the most of it. I want them to feel that best inside them while they are wearing Beyond Label.

  8. Give yourself enough time to shop. Try on different things that you like & stop impulse buying. When I am looking to buy something, I usually go around the shops or I am scrolling online without buying nothing at the end of the shopping session. If I have seen something that is still stuck in my head days or weeks later then I will go & buy it. Do you know why that is? Because I just want to buy things that I will wear & make the most of it while avoiding having a full wardrobe & nothing to wear. Read my blog post about Why do I have a full closet and nothing to wear? if you find yourself asking that & trying to fix it.

I hope that you enjoyed this post. Please leave your feedback in the comments section and share it with anyone that needs it. The next blog post will be out on the 30th of May and we will talk about how to dress successfully depending on body types. Have a great time & remember to shine your light! Xoxo